Vines and Branches

I looked up this passage today because it has been coming across my mind lately. A friend mentioned it as he talked about pruning back some bushes in his yard. My pastor mentioned it Sunday morning in his message. Another friend was talking about grafting vines last night. I've read it many times, but I wanted to go back and re-read the whole passage and really look at it.

"I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit...Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the brances; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me, you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up; and they gather them, and cast them into the fire and they are burned. If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you..." John 15:1-7

The phrase that keeps crossing my mind is this: "apart from Me you can do nothing." I wrote about forgiveness and my battle to forgive someone who has wronged me deeply. The struggle is daily, as sometimes that is as often as the hurts come. I wish this had just been just one wrong in the past that I could forgive and move past, but it is not.  Just yesterday, I got an e-mail and follow-up phone call informing me of a new hurt. How can a wound heal that is constantly re-opened? I suppose it is a sign that I have at least grown a little that I immediately took it to God in prayer. But then it woke me up early this morning, and I wrestled with it again...and again...and again. So back to God I go, "God, I can't do this. I want to obey You. I know this is what You want. Give me Your heart for this person..." and it was then that this phrase - these verses came to my mind. "Apart from Me you can do nothing."  It was almost as if God was answering back, "I know you can't do this...but here is what you can do - abide in Me." This fruit of the Spirit - this unconditional love that forgives and forgives and forgives - if I want it to bloom in my life, I must abide in Christ! 

There is a tree outside my office that sheds branches like no tree I have ever seen.  It seems every morning, there are more branches on the ground. It's not a fruit tree, but still, as I walked in this morning, I looked at those dead branches on the ground, and thought about this passage. What good are dead branches? None at all! Jesus compared them to someone who does not abide in Him - they dry up and are gathered and burned up. And how foolish it would be for a branch lying on the ground to think it can produce even leaves, much less fruit! It has no nutrients, no support system, nothing! I wonder if sometimes I don't start to cut myself off - I'm running late and don't spend time with the Lord...I mean to do it later, but then get busy...and then I start to dry out. I'm not abiding in the Vine. I like the last verse - "if you abide in Me, and My words abide in you..." If I want to see this fruit in my life, I can not afford to let anything separate me from my Vine. That word abide - we don't really use it much anymore - but we say sometimes "our abode" referring to our home. Abiding in Christ isn't something I can do just for a few minutes every day or so. It's a constant state of living in Him - and part of that is letting His words live in me.  If I do those things, He says, "ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you." I know this isn't some genie-in-a-bottle kind of magic promise. But if I am abiding in Him, and His words are abiding in me, my desires are going to be His desires, and He can accomplish them through me.
Right now I am hurting again, and I am clinging to my Vine. I can't produce this fruit in my life, but He can. I want His love to flow through me.